When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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