Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
