I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
third nipple confirmed
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
