i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I'm at about main and main street
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
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