Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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