Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
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