I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I cannot find my penis.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
