Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
did i just pee glitter
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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