was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
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Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
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I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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