CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
soo... how was my night?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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