just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
