normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
