This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Randomize
