My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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