this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I could have mohawked her pubes.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
The adults are the big ones right?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
