Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I need water and some morals
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
