Swine flu. Run for my life!
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize