id be glad to
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
