It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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