so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
