Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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