I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
