with your own penis?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize