I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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