I think scott just propositioned me for sex
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Randomize
