But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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