Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize