you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize