i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
