return my video game
Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
