Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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