she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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