What did we do last night that was yellow?
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
