is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize