he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
