I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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