imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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