just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?