how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
i may or may not be watching the land before time
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.