we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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