I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize