Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
