I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
