Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
