Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
