hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Terrible idea I love it