My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize