is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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