Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
