Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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