dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
