Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
