I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Come on in and take your pants off
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
